Monday, August 01, 2011

Stupid! Lame!

Guys are as lame in most manga as girls are.
They are either totally hard core out to fight for respect (sometimes not by fighting physically) and finding a worthy nakama/comrade or they are evil sick mthfkrs, or they are a mix of both, which is weird but hey. Looking to belong to a crew. Even if they are loners, they have to admit they need others, because even though we don't like to admit it, or even believe it is not true, humans are made to need others, even if we hate that.
Girls are either caring and stupid, or caring and smart, or selfish scheming cows, or a mix. Looking for love and friendship to belong.
B.O.R.I.N.G.
Life is boring.
Today I watched another stupid ad on tv where the person used a stupid slang phrase in order to'reach' the 'target audience'. And I got angry again.
Why do we dumb ourselves down to fit in, or we try to hide our true selves and interests, for whatever stupid reason.
People are stupid, stupid, deliberately trying to be smart for whatever reason but in the end, others see what we do and hear what we say, and we are seen by them as stupid.
S.T.U.P.I.D.
Haha I'm stupid too, complaining so loudly at all the evil and foolishness in the world, alienating others because of my violent emotive outbursts, avoiding other people because I'm so V.U.L.N.E.R.A.B.L.E, what a damn joke.
Life is a big lousy test that nobody can ever get 100% at, except that one guy.
Man... I can't help but admire him. Even though I should be jealous.
But in the end, if I have to live exactly like him, I don't want 100%.
Whoooo that was a terrible thing to say.
But actually, I think it is impossible for an average or even above-average person to get 100% in life. I will be happy just to get a passing grade at the end.
So, stupidity is normal.
I need to accept my normalcy.
Is that a real word...?
Ah well.
In other news, Mr Black is getting much thinner and more decrepit looking. I wonder how much longer he will live?
His family is moving away soon.
So sad.
When I see him sitting in the sun with his tail curled around the support pipe of the fence, smiling to himself and basking, I feel very contented. He simply oozes, no, radiates contentment.
I need to be more like a cat in the sun.
He always greets me when I speak to him, he looks at me and half-closes his eyes politely and happily.
I like him.
He and his family are moving away quite soon, I think.
I will not get to see his absolute last days.
Maybe I don't want to.
When he moves, it is painful to watch him for he is so emaciated, like a coathanger with old fur on.
Poor thing. But you are not alone.
Life is like that when it is running out.
For everyone.
Isn't it?
:(
One day, I will be old, and sit in the sun. I will be happy... like Mr Black.
I hope.
My silent wish that I have not often spoken aloud (and for me that is amazing) is that I will not die unremembered and alone.
But considering that I have not married yet, or had children (and neither of these are mutually exclusive) I may not achieve that wish.
Perhaps God will help me.
After all, He is supposed to help those who can't help themselves.
I will have to ask.
:)
I wonder if it is good to be old and fat or old and thin.
I have bad circulation so putting weight on doesn't help to keep me warm.
I guess old and thin is easier for buying clothes and so on.
Hmmm!
Must think about that.
I do think of unimportant things, but that is because so many people out there worry and think or important things.
It is not my fault that I have nothing important to think on at the moment.
I can't wait to get back to work and think about work stuff.
Yay!

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